In Other Words…
Darlene Schacht is host of ‘In Other Words’ this week. Go to her site to see a list of women who are expounding on this awesome quote!
“One of the secrets to a happy marriage is remembering the source of our joy, which is not one another. The source of our joy is the Lord. Yes, we share tons of joyous moments, but we don’t expect, let alone demand, endless joy-filled moments from each other. “
~ Liz Curtis Higgs ~
from the devotional: Rise and Shine
The young girls in my life are sick of hearing me say to them, “Desperation is so unattractive.” However, I don’t imagine I’ll quit harping on that point any time soon because in this generation more than any other, we have young women who are obsessed with toxic relationships.
It is a given in today’s culture where fathers are often not a part of the family unit that girls will search for this kind of affection and accept it wherever they can find it. Frighteningly, there are those who will prey on these vulnerable ones. So begins the cycle of sexual sin and shame that will become a tool of Satan to haunt a girl the rest of her life. God intended for intimacy to last forever and when it doesn’t, you have a baby girl who is lost and left searching for yet another source. Only God can put His foot in this revolving door of relationship, but moms, hear me well. We have the opportunity to stop it before it begins.
More than any burden I have for my own daughter is that I do this thing of healthy relationship well. I can be emotionally and spiritually whole in Jesus Christ in such a way as to model completeness in my relationship with Him. When we are filled with Christ, we do not have to be needy in relationships with others. Do I need my husband and family? Of course. Friends? You betcha. But am I going to fall apart if they do not meet my every expectation? No, ma’am. They can not meet mine. I can’t meet theirs and I’ve learned, it’s okay. There was only One who came to meet my needs, and it isn’t Y-O-U!
Jesus said in John 4:13, “Everyone who drinks of this water will thirst again; but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him shall never thirst; but the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life.” He is speaking of salvation but I believe we can also draw the conclusion that the life He gives fills every needy place to capacity. There is no thirst where the water flows freely.
Healthy moms + Healthy daughters = Healthy marriages. It’s that simple yet the most daunting of challenges. Let’s get this one right, girls. Thankfully, we are not alone in the task. “Our soul waits for the Lord, He is our help and our shield. For our heart rejoices in Him, because we trust in His holy name. Let Your lovingkindness, O Lord, be upon us, according as we have hoped in You.” Psalm 33:20-22
Very beautifully put!
I love your blog design. Awesome!!
And about the post: that was written so well, being a reminder to moms to raise our daughters through healthy relationships both with us and with their Father, God.
The living water reminds me of a thing we used to do when we were kids. We’d munch down our dinners and then we’d drink some water assuming that the water was filling in all of the missing spaces the food didn’t get too. Basically we were over-eating, but you get my point… The living water is able to seep into every crevice to fill those missing spots, leaving us full and content.
Oh, my goodness, you’re reading my mind! One of my percolating topics for Marriage Monday is how to raise daughters to function and thrive in marriage. I pray every day that I can be a godly example for my daughter to follow and that above all I know how to ask for forgiveness. The line about God putting his foot in the revolving door of relationships is a wonderful image!! I love this post!
I LOVE this! As the mom of 2 daughters, and the product of divorce, I want to model what is a healthy marriage for them so that they will grow up with an honest understanding of the work and the joy of marriage. Thank you!
What a great perspective…thanks for sharing. It is one of my biggest concerns in raising my daughter.
Blessings
Amen, Amen. I can write a book on the effect of sin in this area, and you are right Satan tries to hold it over the girl, but praise God we have someone bigger who can set us free.
Hello, thanks for visiting my blog and commenting!
I hadn’t thought about it from the point of view of mother/daughter. I have an infant son, and I’m terrified of having a little girl for those very reasons! While boys also have their share of temptation, the things girls face are a totally different monster!
Teaching our daughters where their source comes from is essential. That is important to me, because it took me so long to learn that myself! I want my two daughters to know this from the start. Thanks for the thoughts, Lisa!
Lisa, you’re so very right, but this applies to boys, as well. I have a 16 yr. old son and teaching him about purity and abstinence and following the Lord and living a life that is pleasing to Him is just as difficult, I believe, as teaching our daughters that.
I know that there are some very “aggressive” girls out there that are searching for love and acceptance so bad that they will “prey” on a guy that will look their direction. And the poor guys, get caught up in any girl that gives them the time of day!
Learning that Christ alone is our only fulfillment is hard enough as an adult, much less a teenager.
Good post, very thought provoking and I love the way you write. Wisdom comes spilling out of your pores!
Amen to that, Lisa :) – You know, I always wanted a baby girl. But looking at today’s soceity, I am kind of glad that I didn’t have one.
I think you are teaching the right attitude to your little girl. She is truly blessed to have a mom like you :).
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this week’s IOW quote — now I don’t feel so much like an outside *smile*
Blessings to you and yours :)
Beautiful, well said. Sweet blessings to you always.
Thanks for visiting my site – It’s always great to meet another preacher’s wife.
I appreciate your take on the quote as well – Keep spreading the word about healthy relationships. It’s a long and difficult process to heal from the hurt of those toxic relationships. Thank God He can and does restore, but it would be so much better if He didn’t have to!
I spend a lot of time ministering to women who’ve been abused, and know how difficult it can be to restore a woman’s sense of God-worth.
Bonnie
This is a beautiful reminder for all of us as we help nurture and mentor young women. I also think, however, that Dad’s need to understand this message…they don’t often “get” just how important their relationship with their daughter’s is for emotional well-being.
Blessings.
Susan
The theme for the Alabama State Acteens conference is “Complete”
Col 2:10: And you are complete through your union with Christ. He is the Lord over every ruler and authority in the universe (The Message)We cannot be built up in Christ, unless we are first rooted in him. Working with girls through Acteens for the past ten years has shown me so much. Unhealthy girls turn into unhealthy women. We are complete with Christ alone.